Love Is More Than Obsession
by OuiSexSi
Summary: One day, Juvia asks Gray out, and he does what Lucy never expected; he says yes. At first, she doesn't know what to do, but one thing's for sure, she's not going to stand for it! And she doesn't care what she has to do to get Juvia out of the way. GrayxLucy fic. T for now, may change to M later.
1. One Word

**Warning: This story is not for the faint of heart. It's rated horror for a reason. There won't be an excessive amount of gore or anything like that, but some may be uncomfortable with what's to come. I won't say more than that for now, I don't want to spoil it for anyone, but just be warned. **

**True Juvia haters will more than likely enjoy reading this as the story goes on.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

* * *

One word.

One little word was all it took.

And Lucy's world came crashing down.

"Yes."

That one word kept ringing in her mind, over and over.

_Yes. Yes. Yes._

She hadn't been able to believe it when she first heard, thought it was a mistake, thought her ears were playing tricks on her.

But no.

As much as she wished that were the case, her ears weren't playing tricks on her.

She had heard right.

He'd said _yes_.

But I'm getting ahead of myself here, I'll start from the beginning.

* * *

_It was a normal day in the guild hall of Fairy Tail, people drank, people brawled, people laughed. Natsu, Erza, Lucy, and Gray were sitting at a table, relaxing, and deciding on their next mission. They had two flyers on the table, and were examining them._

_"This one has a lot more pay…" Lucy mumbled._

_"But this one looks harder!" Natsu argued. _

_"Which is why we should choose this one!" _

_"What?! I wanna beat these guys to a pulp!"_

_"No, I do!" Gray argued, slamming his head against Natsu's. Sparks flashed between their eyes as they glared at each other._

_"You wanna go, Ice Princess?"_

_"Anytime, Flame Brain."_

_A shadow loomed over them, "THIS IS NO TIME TO BE FIGHTING!"_

_Natsu and Gray sprung apart, and Erza cooled down instantly, smiling again. Lucy couldn't help but laugh a little._

_"Now, back to the matter at hand." Erza said._

_"I think we should take the higher paying job. If I can't pay my rent soon, I might get kicked out, and the money from all the other recent jobs we've done has gone for repairs." Lucy said._

_"Yes, and it seems fairly easy, so there would probably be minimal damage done…" Erza said thoughtfully, then nodded decisively. "We'll leave tomorrow!"_

_Gray and Natsu looked like they wanted to argue, but because it had been Erza to say it, they were hesitant. _

_And it was just about then that Juvia walked up to the table. _

_She touched the tips of her pointer fingers bashfully, cheeks heating up already, and then shyly looked up at Gray._

_Since everyone was quiet right then, when she began talking, it got the attention of everyone._

_"G-Gray-Sama, Juvia w-wanted t-t-to ask you something." Juvia stuttered, her eyes moving from Gray to her fingers, then back to Gray._

_Now, it was no secret that Juvia was obsessed with Gray, but what she did next was unexpected, and completely put Gray on the spot._

_"J-J-Juvia w-wants to know if G-Gray-sama will date her."_

_Erza, Lucy, and most of all Gray were completely shocked. Even Natsu was quiet. Juvia had tried everything but the direct approach, until now._

_Gray looked thoughtful for a moment, and a little nervous. His eyes moved from his teammates back to Juvia, before he straightened up, looked steadily at her, and answered._

_"Yes."_

_And just like that, everything changed. _

_The world seemed to slow around Lucy. She stayed completely still, her face void of expression, as Erza announced it to the rest of the guild. Everyone cheered and hooted, congratulating the new couple. _

_Lucy still couldn't believe it._

_She couldn't move._

_She couldn't breathe._

_She just sat there._

_Then, very slowly, very quietly, she got up from her seat and slipped out of the guild, unnoticed amongst all the chaos._

* * *

**This was meant to be more of an introduction than a chapter, but I'll label it a chapter anyway. **

**I'll do my best to keep the characters as IC as possible, but they tend to be a little unpredictable at times in the anime, so no promises.**

**I'm always open to ideas, and if you have questions or concerns, reviews are welcome, as well as PM's if you prefer the more direct approach.**

**If anyone's willing to be a beta, I won't argue. In fact, it'd be a pleasure to have one.**

**Hope you enjoyed, thanks for reading, and remember: ideas, questions, concerns, and ****constructive**** criticism is always welcome.**


	2. Darkened Thoughts

**Side-note: In case any of you out there don't know, a 'nakama' is someone that's very, very special. Like friend, and family, only more, but not romantical. Someone you'd give your life for, and more, basically, whether blood-related or not. It's a term that Natsu, and all of Fairy Tail, use often when referring to each other.**

**This chapter is still building up to the more intense stuff, I want to make the story at least somewhat realistic.**

* * *

_Lucy wandered for hours, and it wasn't until after midnight that her tired feet finally brought her up to the door of her apartment. Her hand reached for the doorknob, and she'd been just about to turn the handle when she'd heard muffled voices inside._

_Knowing her team mates were in there, Lucy gulped and pulled her hand from the doorknob quickly. She took a step back, walking away from her apartment. _

_She couldn't face them._

_Not now._

_Not with her puffy, red eyes, or with her aching, tight chest, or the fake smile she was sure she'd have to paint onto her face from now on._

_So she walked away from the apartment, down the road, and plopped down in front of the river._

_And just sat there, thinking._

_She wasn't going to cry again, she told herself, she had cried enough._

_Instead, she stared blankly at the water._

_Despite that, the tears overflowed anyway, she was helpless to them._

_Seconds ticked by, which turned to minutes, and then hours._

_And all she did was stare at the water, as tears ran silently down her cheeks._

_Tears that sparkled in the moonlight._

_Beautiful._

_Tragic._

_Just like her._

_She didn't know how long it had been that she had sat there like that, but finally, she got up, dusted herself off, and headed for the nearest hotel._

Which brings us to where we are now.

"Here's ten-thousand jewels." Lucy said, knowing she would have to get a job now if she wanted to keep her apartment. The inn keeper smiled at her and directed her to one of the empty rooms there.

It wasn't too expensive an inn, thankfully, but was certainly a comfortable one.

Because she didn't have any clean clothes with her, she didn't bother taking a shower. Instead Lucy slipped under the covers and closed her eyes. Initially, she thought she wouldn't be able to sleep, but it didn't take long for unconsciousness to claim her.

_It was dark._

_She couldn't see anything._

_She wandered, not knowing where she was going._

_Feeling hopeless._

_Lost._

_Alone._

_And then he was there._

_Hope._

_Light._

_Happiness._

_But he was walking away._

_Away from her._

_And there was nothing she could do to stop it._

_But that didn't mean she wasn't going to try! _

_She wouldn't let him slip away that easily._

_The cure to her hopelessness._

_The light to guide her way._

_The happiness to remedy her loneliness._

_So Lucy ran. _

_She chased after him, stretching out her arm as far as she could, reaching for him, and calling his name._

_Yet he didn't respond._

_Didn't turn around._

_Didn't give any signal that he had heard her._

_He just kept walking._

_Then, finally, Lucy seemed to be catching up. _

_But just as she was about to grab hold of his shoulder, another figure appeared._

_Juvia._

_Lucy stopped dead in her tracks and watched as the water woman leaned forward._

_She knew what Juvia was going to do._

_She was going to kiss Gray._

_Lucy stared, horrified._

_And then she lunged._

_But it was too late._

_There was something in her way._

_Something invisible that stopped her._

_She could only watch as their lips got closer._

_Closer._

_Almost touching._

_And then…_

Lucy jolted up, wide-eyed. She rubbed her eyes sleepily, and then frowned. Apparently she couldn't even escape in her dreams.

She stood up and stretched, then looked around for a clock, but didn't see one. With a shrug, she decided to go back to her apartment and shower. Lucy wanted to avoid it in case her teammates were still there, but she didn't have any clean clothes, and didn't have any money on her to buy new ones. Besides, she needed to save her money.

With a sigh, she grabbed her purse and walked out of the inn.

_Oh well, at least I feel a little better today,_ she thought to herself.

Unbeknownst to her, it wouldn't last long.

* * *

Her apartment wasn't far, and she walked along the river on the way there, balancing just on the edge. The guys that always rode down it on a boat called to her to watch her step.

They always did.

It felt nice to be doing something familiar, peaceful. She could almost convince herself that nothing had changed. Almost.

After reaching her apartment, Lucy waited, but heard nothing inside. And indeed, when she turned the handle, she found it unlocked, but her apartment was unoccupied.

Letting go of a small sigh of relief that she hadn't realized she'd been holding in, she walked inside, grabbed some clean clothes, and headed straight for her bathroom.

On the way to her apartment, she had been able to distract herself, but once she was in the shower, her thoughts claimed her. Under the warm water that drenched her hair and cascaded over her skin, unwanted thoughts loomed over her. Thoughts she didn't want to face, but try as she might to ignore them, they still berated her.

What she most wanted to know was _why_, she thought to herself, lathering up her hair with soap. That was always the question in these types of situations. Why? Why had he said yes? Why had he agreed? Could it be possible that Gray really had feelings for Juvia? She shuddered, thinking of the day before.

It had been so sudden, and she had been so unprepared.

She knew she should feel happy for him. He was such a close friend, her nakama, and she wanted, so badly, for him to be more. She felt guilty for feeling the way she did, but she couldn't help it. It had hurt so much.

And Juvia, Lucy had never had that much of a problem with Juvia. Even through all of Juvia's false assumptions of Lucy and Gray. They had been false at first, at least, but as time wore on, Lucy had felt closer and closer to Gray. That had all changed yesterday. Lucy had only realized that she had feelings for him two months ago, but, she admitted to herself as she soaped up her body, she wasn't aware just how strong they were until reality had hit her in the face the previous day.

Juvia was her nakama though, too, right? She was a Fairy Tail member as much as Lucy was. So shouldn't Lucy feel happy for her, too? But she couldn't even bring herself to want to feel happy for Juvia. Sure, she felt a little guilty about it, but her emotions towards the obsessive water mage had darkened yesterday, and were only continuing to do so.

Obsession. That's what got to Lucy the most, Juvia only thought she was in love with Gray. In truth, she was simply obsessed. And that was what had annoyed Lucy the worst. All the times Juvia would exclaim, "Juvia loves Gray-sama!", it would grate on Lucy's nerves.

Love. There was so much more to love, Juvia didn't understand. Lucy loved Gray, Juvia didn't.

But if she loved him, why couldn't she be happy for him? The answer was simple: because Juvia didn't deserve him.

If it had been someone else, Mirajane, or even Erza, Lucy would still have been sad. She would still have cried, and her heart would still have been broken, but she wouldn't be feeling like this. Because, whether it was Mirajane, or Erza, they would have had genuine feelings for Gray. Not some stupid obsession, some 'love at first sight' nonsense.

The more Lucy thought about Juvia, the more she disliked her.

Juvia, always following Gray around, even going as far as to stalk him on missions. She thought she was being so sly, but Lucy had noticed many times, and who knew how many times she hadn't?

Juvia, always standing by and staring stupidly at Gray with those big, infatuated eyes of hers. The more Lucy thought of them, the more feral they seemed, like a hungry animal's ready to pounce on her prey. Disgusting.

Juvia, always exclaiming how she 'loved' Gray. Lies. Lucy loved him, Juvia didn't know the meaning of love.

Obsessive. Annoying. Presumptuous. Clingy.

These words were what came to mind when Lucy thought about Juvia. Most of these thoughts weren't new, Lucy had had them fleetingly in the past, but she hadn't wanted to think badly of her 'nakama', so she had pushed them to the back of her mind. Now, though, they bubbled over as she brooded on them.

Vaguely, she realized that all the shampoo was out of her hair now, and the soap was off her skin. With that same burning, painful feeling in her chest, she reached over and turned off the water.

The feeling hadn't gotten any better, she had just gotten a little bit more used to it.

Maybe she could face her teammates after all.

Maybe she could face him after all.

But not yet, she needed time, which meant that she was going to avoid going to the guild today. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe for a few days.

She was going to avoid him.

After drying herself off, she put on her black miniskirt and pink tube top, then stepped out of the bathroom. The sight before her caused her to wince visibly, but she collected herself quickly, doing her best to ignore the pain that shot through her heart and instead looked questioningly at the person in front of her.

The person she least wanted to see right now.

Gray.

"Hey Lucy."

So much for avoiding.

* * *

**I decided I'm going to try to update this on Wednesdays and Saturdays. If you find any typos, please let me know. I'd also like a beta, so if any of you are willing, I'd be very appreciative!**

**Thank you so much for reading my story, I know it's a little slow right now, but it WILL get better. Just wait until chapter five...that was a fun one to write. **

**Ahem, anyway, reviews are GREATLY appreciated. Now I understand what all the authors talk about how happy they are to get reviews, it's really, really exciting, and very encouraging. **

**Thanks again, PM me if you have anything you'd like to ask/suggest/say.**


	3. Strange Behavior

**As promised, here's the most recent update.**

**Note: I know my chapters are a little short right now, but as time goes on, they'll probably become longer, in fact, they already are. And I know the story is a little slow right now, but it DOES get better.**

* * *

Lucy looked at him confused, took a deep breath, and tried to respond as steadily as she could.

"Hey Gray, what're you doing here?" she asked, pushing away the upset feeling that she got in her stomach just from looking at him.

He stared at her for a few seconds, as if waiting for her to say or do something, but when she didn't, he replied.

"I came to get you for the job, Erza and Natsu just went to pack but they'll be here any min-"

"OI!" Natsu burst into the room, Erza right behind him, "What's taking you guys so long?"

Oh, the job. She had completely forgotten about the job.

"Oh! I forgot to pack!" Lucy said, and started to run around the room frantically, looking for things to pack, but then stopped. It would probably take her at least half an hour, if not more, and it was her own fault for forgetting. She was just holding them up, so instead, she turned to the others and forced herself to smile.

"You guys can go without me this time."

"What? No way!" Natsu exclaimed.

"We wouldn't leave you behind." Gray added.

"You can just come without packing!" Natsu said enthusiastically, which earned him a whack over the head from Erza, who then turned to smile at Lucy.

"You're our nakama, Lucy. We'll just wait while you pack."

She was touched by all three of them, but Gray's words had made her heart ache more. She stubbornly pushed away the thought that he had already left her behind.

"Right! Then I'll hurry!" she said, trying to be enthusiastic and even grinning, which she found a little difficult. It seemed to work.

They all nodded and decided to sit down, obviously figuring it would be safer for them to be out of her way, since she was currently zooming around at top speed.

Happy took a spot on Natsu's head after her face almost collided with him. Apparently neither ground nor air was safe.

It only took her about fifteen minutes to pack, contrary to what she'd thought before, and when she was done they all got up and headed out of the door. Once Lucy had locked it, the team started down the road.

Natsu chattered on about this and that, he and Gray getting in arguments here and there, only to be stopped by Erza, who was smiling softly to herself most of the time, aside from when she was looking frighteningly at Gray and Natsu.

Lucy was surprised that Juvia wasn't accompanying them, and debated on asking.

Would it make her seem suspicious?

Would it give her away?

Maybe she shouldn't say anything.

They were arguing for about the third time, and she was tuning them out until Natsu said something that caught her attention.

"Even your girlfriend didn't want to go with you on the mission!" Natsu yelled.

Juvia didn't want to go with Gray on the mission? For just a moment a small spark of hope bloomed in her chest, but it was quickly squashed.

"It's not that she didn't want to, she already had something to do. She's coming next time." Gray snarled back.

Lucy stopped walking and frowned. She wasn't sure she would be able to handle it if Juvia joined the team.

"I bet that was just an excuse!"

"At least I _have_ a girlfriend!"

"I can get a girlfriend too!" Natsu yelled, and then looked around. Erza had her fists and teeth clenched, and had a large vein popping out of her head. She opened her mouth to yell at them again just when Natsu ran over to Lucy.

"Lucy! Will you be my girlfriend?!" he asked with a big grin.

Lucy was shocked. She looked at the ground, bangs shielding her eyes, angry that he'd ask her just because she was there. She was not happy.

A part of her, though, almost wanted to say yes. Maybe he could help her get over Gray. But she didn't feel that way towards him, she would just be using him.

_Like he just tried to do to you?_ a little voice mocked in her head.

_He doesn't know better,_ she reasoned, but that didn't make her any less angry.

She wouldn't do that, she wouldn't just use him, and it was only a very small, very hurt part of her that even considered it.

For the most part, she was just flat-out furious.

Very slowly, she looked up at him, a dark aura surrounding her, eyes full of anger. Then, she exploded.

"You don't just ask _any_ girl to be your girlfriend, Natsu! They have to mean something to you! Something more than just being a nakama! It has to be _special_."

She purposely, and with strong self control, kept her eyes from automatically drifting to Gray.

"More than a nakama? Special? I don't get it." he said, oblivious as ever.

"Of course you don't. Some people in this guild will never get it." She said the last part bitterly, thinking of a certain blue haired water mage.

"Lucy, wh-"

"Just shut up." she told Natsu coldly, clenching her fists, and walking past first him, then Erza, and lastly Gray.

She had to bite her lip when walking past the ice mage to keep from letting go of the tears in her eyes that were threatening to fall.

Behind her, she heard Erza beating up Natsu, and Natsu exclaiming loudly, wanting to know what he did wrong.

Stupid Natsu. He always was immature. Normally, she didn't care, sometimes it could be funny, even endearing.

And sometimes she ended up getting hurt because of it, like right now.

Was that all she was good for?

A last resort?

Could she not be wanted for who she was, but only because she was there?

Or, in this case, only to be used in an argument to prove a point?

Now her pride hurt along with the rest of her. Could this day get any worse?

She thought she'd better not jinx it, it was already bad enough. Bordering on the top five worst days of her lives, right along with the day before.

* * *

Gray stared out of the window, thinking.

His thoughts weren't on Juvia, like they had been the night before.

No, this time they were on a certain blonde, celestial mage.

A certain blonde, celestial mage who was sitting right across from him, staring out the window.

Lucy.

Something was different about her.

That morning, she hadn't even yelled at him for entering her apartment without knocking. He didn't get some lecture about "personal space". No, instead she had just asked him what he was doing there.

She had forgotten about the mission, and with Lucy so close to the time it was to pay her rent, that was very out of character for her. Lucy had never once forgotten to pack.

Then, on the walk to the train, she had been quiet almost the entire time. He hadn't seen her smile even once. Not that he had been paying all that much attention, but even so, he was sure she was normally not so stoic.

And worst of all, the way she had yelled at Natsu wasn't like her. Of course, she'd had a right to be angry at the idiot after what he did, but the Lucy he knew had never seemed as hurt or cold as she had right then. Natsu's question shouldn't have upset her so much.

Unless…

Unless she had feelings for Natsu, he thought with a sinking feeling.

If that was the case, it would be even more of a reason for her to get so angry. More of a reason for her to feel hurt, betrayed.

But not one for him to feel so disappointed.

So why was he?

Maybe it was because he knew things wouldn't work out for them. Natsu was too immature to even consider something like a relationship.

Too dense.

So of course it was natural for him to feel disappointed and concerned.

She was his nakama. He just didn't want her hurt, that was all.

But that didn't explain why she hadn't come back to the apartment the night before.

Why, even though Natsu, Erza, and himself all slept over, she never checked in.

Why she hadn't reacted to Gray inviting himself into her apartment.

And why, worst of all, when she had seen his face, a flicker of pain had crossed her own.

Could he have done something to cause that? What could it have been? There wasn't anything that he could imagine that had caused her to look at him like that.

He almost wanted to ask her what was wrong. But Gray rarely asked anyone that.

If she had something she wanted to talk to him about, she would talk to him.

Still, he couldn't stop himself from wondering what it was.

* * *

**So, I need your help. I'm not completely satisfied with the name of the last chapter, and I'm open for opinions. As for this chapter, I'm also unsure what to call it, so please, if you have an idea, PM me or leave it in a review.**

**To those of you who were looking forward to a confrontation, I'm sorry, but it's not quite time for that...yet. **

**Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.**


	4. Despicable Greed

**To start off, I want to thank all my lovely reviewers for how supportive they've been! It's really motivated me to write more, and I appreciate it so much!**

I'd also like to thank a very special friend of mine, Tia, who's helped me, in a way, beta my chapters, by reading them and picking out any typos. Still, if you see any mistakes, please let me know!

* * *

Lucy looked down at the address on the flyer, and then back up at the large mansion in front of her.

"Yep, this is the place!" she said, and made her way up to the large, double doors with the others following close behind.

"Wow! It's huge!" Natsu exclaimed, referring to the mansion, and indeed it was. In fact, it was almost as large as her father's mansion.

When they reached the doors, Erza raised her fist and knocked very loudly. A few moments later the door was opened, and a tall, skinny man who looked to be at least sixty years old stood there. He wore a monocle on his right eye, and his suit was black, with a white undershirt. His eyebrows were so far up and his eyelids so far down that his eyes didn't even seem to be open.

"I presume you're here to see the master." he said, sounding formal.

"That's right, we're here for the job." Erza said.

"Follow me." he told them, and turned away.

Happy whispered something into Natsu's ear and they both snickered. Lucy smiled at their carefree personalities, wishing she could forget all her troubles as easily.

She had been making more of an effort to seem happier ever since the train ride, where both Erza and Gray had been giving her weird looks, occasionally staring as though trying to analyze her.

Lucy thought she may have been imagining things, so at one point she had turned her head while both were staring and smiled at them. The two of them had quickly looked away, confirming her suspicions.

Luckily, Happy and Natsu hadn't appeared to have noticed anything different about Lucy. No, they were just as oblivious as ever, and Natsu was too busy dealing with motion sickness anyway, while Happy chattered on idly about random things, mostly having to do with fish.

So now, as they walked down the large hall, she smiled at things that Natsu and Happy said, commented on things that Gray and Erza said, and even laughed when Erza hit Gray and Natsu over the head once again for beginning to argue.

"This is not the time for arguing!" she'd bellowed. Lucy was surprised that the butler leading them hadn't ordered them out already.

At last, they came to the room. The butler reached up, knocked.

"Sir, the guests for the job are here."

"Come in." they all heard from inside. He opened up the door and ushered the rest of them in, before following after.

A dark haired man was leaning over a desk with papers scattered all over the top, pen in hand. He looked up when they walked in, and calmly put the pen down, before folding his hands.

"Thank you for coming," he started off formally, before continuing, "As you know, my son has been abducted by thieves who are holding him for ransom. They require 4,000,000 jewels, which I am not willing to pay."

Lucy stiffened, but kept quiet. Natsu, however, did not.

"But he's your son!" he yelled, receiving a warning glare from Erza.

The man turned to look at Natsu, and Lucy noticed that his eyes were like chips of ice.

Cold.

Selfish.

Merciless.

"That's why I hired you to get him back for me." the man said.

"Sir, do you realize that this could put him in more danger?" Erza asked. He shrugged, not seeming to care.

"Just make sure he's alive and not permanently handicapped. Fractures or broken bones are fine, as long as nothing's dismembered."

Lucy's fingers twitched, but she kept herself from balling her hands into fists.

Erza nodded curtly, she obviously didn't agree with the way this man was talking about his son, but she kept quiet about it. Gray was rigid, his face expressionless, but Lucy could tell he wasn't happy.

Natsu wasn't doing as good of a job of it, he was openly glaring at the man, and looked as though he wanted to say something. Flames were playing at his fingers, weaving in and out between them, going all the way up to his wrist.

Even Happy looked horrified at what the father had said.

He either didn't notice, or didn't care. Instead, he continued to talk.

"They sent a message, telling me to bring the money to the top of Sunrise Hill. I informed them I'd be there at midday tomorrow."

The group turned and walked out without another word, not even asking for directions.

Natsu was the first to open the door, managing to melt the handle partially, but Erza didn't even lecture him for it. None of them spoke as they made their way back down the hall, no longer needing the butler to guide them. In fact, the strange man had disappeared as soon as he had let them into the room.

When they were outside the room, they turned to walk down the walkway towards the town. Natsu was quietly fuming, but he didn't speak. The only one that said anything before they reached the town was Erza, who muttered,

"What a despicable man."

To which Lucy silently agreed.

* * *

As it turned out, Sunrise Hill was a tall, grassy hill that rose up out of the forest, and was void of trees, unlike the rest of the land. It earned its name because it was the best place to watch sunrises for miles around. No trees to obscure the view, comfortable grass to sit on, and high enough to see for miles in every direction.

It was about five miles from the town, meaning the group didn't have much time before setting off. However, they were all hungry, so Erza picked a random restaurant, and the five of them seated themselves.

Natsu had calmed down by now, and was very enthusiastic to start eating, Happy too.

Gray still seemed a little bothered, but he as well had calmed, and Erza didn't make any signs of something troubling her.

It was only Lucy who was still upset about it.

_Just one more thing to bring my mood down,_ she thought glumly.

After they had ordered, and when the food arrived, all of them dug in happily, except for Lucy.

Instead, she picked at her plate, occasionally bringing the fork to her mouth and taking a bite out of her noodles.

"Hey Lucy, you gonna eat that?" Natsu asked, looking with interest at her plate.

She sighed and pushed it towards him.

"No, you can have it Natsu, I'm not very hungry."

Erza frowned at her.

"Lucy, have you even eaten today?"

"Oh yeah, I ate this morning." she told Erza.

A pang of guilt shot through her stomach, she hated lying, but she just couldn't stomach any food right now.

Erza looked at her intensely, before turning back to her own food. Gray was also looking at her, Lucy noticed, from the corner of her eye. She avoided his gaze and instead reached her arms up in a stretch, then changed the subject.

"Ahh I can't wait to see the sunrise from the hill, it sounds so beautiful." she said wistfully. Erza, surprisingly, agreed.

"Yes, I'm also interested in seeing that."

"Wow Lucy, you're such a girl sometimes." Happy told her.

"What do you mean 'sometimes'?!" she yelled, shaking her fist angrily at the blue exceed, who flew too far up for her to reach.

Everyone laughed at that, glad that Lucy was acting like herself again.

* * *

About two and a half miles into the forest, Lucy's stomach growled loudly, and she groaned softly. She was beginning to regret not eating at the restaurant.

"You should have eaten back there." Erza scolded.

"I wasn't hungry then."

"Now you're unprepared." came the reply.

"I can always eat when we stop." Lucy pointed out.

"Yes, but now you'll have to suffer for at least two more miles. We can't stop until it's time to set up camp, I want to set up before it gets too dark."

She did have a point, the moon wasn't even half full and the trees would obscure the little light that did shine through them, but at least the fire would be enough to see.

Lucy just sighed, but didn't argue. She wouldn't have asked for them to stop anyway, it would have been inconvenient.

After another hour or two, they reached a place that was about a quarter mile from the hill. Erza stopped there, and they all began to set up camp.

"I'll collect the firewood." Lucy told the rest of them, before turning to walk off into the forest.

Mostly, the celestial mage just wanted some time alone.

She collected various pieces here and there, before stumbling upon a pretty little circular clearing. It was completely covered with grass and had flowers popping up in random places.

It was beautiful.

She smiled softly to herself, before walking back to the camp.

It was nice having some time by herself, she didn't have to pretend to be happy. Of course, she wasn't pretending the entire time, she had mostly pushed the feelings of sadness into the back of her mind, and it was easier to concentrate on happier things, but her heart still nagged at her no matter what she did or thought of.

Behind every smile there was a hint of sadness.

Behind every laugh, a hint of force.

But nothing kept Lucy down for long, and even if her heart did ache every time she looked at Gray, she wouldn't let it keep her from being happy.

She didn't know yet, that in the next few days, it was going to get so much worse.

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**Well, I thought about putting part of Chapter 5 in here, but you guys might get mad at me for that - there's such a thing as too much suspense. Still, I think most of you will probably like that chapter a lot, at least I hope so. Reviews and PM's are always very appreciated, thank you very much again to everyone who reviewed. And thank you, Tia, for helping so much.**

Hope you enjoyed.

**P.S. Told you my chapters get longer! Also, if anyone has a story idea for this chapter, please PM me. A few of you did give me some wonderful ideas for Chapter names, and thank you very much for that!** **I'm a little OCD, so I'll probably try to name each chapter with two words each. Sorry for rambling, Chapter 5 will be up on Saturday!**


	5. Midnight Surprises

**IMPORTANT: I will probably be unable to update this story any further until after June 12th. I will be far too busy with schoolwork until then. Once school is over, I'll go back to my previous schedule of updating. But at least this chapter is a little longer, right?  
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**Well, here it is. I hope you all enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it - I really enjoyed writing it.**

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When Lucy arrived back at the camp, her arms were full of wood all the way up to her chin. She dumped it all a few feet away from the fire and dusted off her hands, satisfied.

"Wood's collected." she told them matter-of-factly, before going to unroll her sleeping bag, and then sitting on one of the logs that had been placed near the fire.

"Here." Erza smiled and handed Lucy a sandwich, which she happily took a bite of. It was delicious.

"Thank you." Lucy said, when she'd swallowed the bite, and returned the smile.

Soon all five of them were sitting around the fire. They chatted and talked about this and that, keeping away from the subject of the boy's father. Before long Erza was ordering them to get to sleep so they'd be energized by the next day.

Lucy slipped into her sleeping bag and closed her eyes, but try as she might, she couldn't fall asleep. Thoughts kept bombarding her, even though she pushed them away, they were insistent.

Thoughts of the boy's horrible father.

Thoughts of Gray.

Her emotions were completely mixed up, she felt so many things.

Sadness.

Guilt.

Confusion.

Anger.

She tried her best to push them down, but they simmered inside until she couldn't take it anymore.

Very quietly, she got up from her sleeping bag, slipped her shoes on, and walked into the forest.

It was dark, but just enough moonlight streamed through the trees to illuminate her way. Once or twice, she thought she heard something behind her, a twig snap, a footstep. She'd turned around to look, but it was too dark to see that far, and from what she could see, there was no one.

_I'm just imagining things,_ she told herself firmly, but she couldn't suppress the shiver of anxiety that ran down her spine.

_At least it helps keep your mind off your troubles,_ a little voice in her head told her bitterly, to which she silently agreed.

After about ten minutes of walking, she breathed a small sigh of relief.

She'd found it.

The clearing with the grass and the flowers.

Lucy walked to the middle of it and sat down. She pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, while looking up at the sky with a thoughtful expression.

It was such a beautiful night. The moonlight was just bright enough the light up the entire clearing, but not so bright that it blocked out the light of the stars.

They reminded her of her celestial spirits, those of which she valued as both guardians and friends, and smiled fondly to herself, wondering what they were doing.

She considered calling Loke out to talk to him, but decided against it. He would just hit on her anyway, even if she confessed everything to him.

And besides, this was something she needed to work out on her own.

No one could do it for her.

She sighed, resting her head on her knees and closing her eyes.

Images of Juvia in Gray's arms came to mind.

Juvia caressing Gray's cheek.

Juvia leaning up to…

"No!" Lucy whispered with conviction. Her hands balled into fists.

"No, I can't think like that. I can't…" she muttered to herself, shaking her head.

She hugged her knees to herself more tightly as a few stray tears fell down her cheeks.

Thinking of Gray with Juvia…

Her dream came to mind and she gasped as a small pain shot through her heart, barely keeping herself from crying out.

"What am I doing?" she mumbled through the tears, "I'm stronger than this…Maybe I'll just have to accept it."

That hurt more than resisting it, but it may be the only way to get over it.

Could she do it?

The answer came for her.

"No."

Her eyes widened, and she swiftly wiped the tears from her eyes, before standing up and whirling around. Instinctively, she went to reach for her keys, which she realized she'd left back at the camp in her sleeping bag. She couldn't have called Loke if she'd wanted to.

Someone stepped out of the trees and walked towards her.

"Gray?" she asked, disbelievingly, ignoring both the spasm of pain that always shot through her heart now when he appeared unexpectedly, and the ache that followed after it.

"Don't ever accept anything that upsets you this much. Fight it." he was standing in front of her now, hands in pockets, looking at her intensely.

Lucy sighed, "You don't know what you're saying,"

The blonde, celestial mage almost wanted to laugh at the irony.

"What am I saying, Lucy?"

She shook her head, then narrowed her eyes and questioned cautiously, "How long have you been standing there…?"

"Long enough."

"You followed me!" she accused.

He shrugged, "I couldn't sleep."

"Which means…" he'd been standing there from the beginning. She inwardly cringed and thought desperately back to what she'd said out loud, and what she hadn't.

Had she mentioned his name?

Or Juvia's?

No, she didn't think so.

She hoped not.

As though reading her mind, he continued the sentence for her.

"Yes, from the beginning."

She glared at him and crossed her arms, deliberately turning her back to him with a huff.

He sat down, pulling his knees partway up, and resting his arms on them, forearms crossed, relaxed.

With a sigh of defeat, Lucy sat down by him, unable to stay mad at him.

"So why didn't you let me know you were there before?"

"I wanted to see where you were going."

"And when I was just sitting here?"

He looked directly at her, "I wanted to see if you were meeting someone."

Lucy's eyes widened, she was truly shocked. Did he think she was a traitor? That she'd meet one of the thieves out here?

"Someone?" she asked softly, staring at him.

He shrugged nonchalantly, and asked as if it were obvious, "Natsu?"

Oh.

She continued to stare at him for a few more moments, before bursting into laughter.

"_Natsu? Why_ would I meet _Natsu_?" Lucy asked, continuing to laugh.

"Well, after this morning…" he trailed off.

This morning? She turned away, confused, and thought back to earlier that day. Suddenly she understood.

Natsu had asked her out just to prove that he could get a girlfriend, and she'd blown up on him. To anyone else, it probably looked like she was hurt because she thought he was using her. Which was true, she was, but not because she had feelings for him.

And that was probably exactly what it looked like, that she had feelings for him. Because she had overreacted.

Lucy shook her head again and looked up at the stars now with a small smile of amusement on her lips.

"Gray, I don't feel that way towards Natsu. When he asked me out, I was…hurt," at this, her eyes dropped, and she stared down at her knees before continuing, "It was like he was asking me because I was just there, not because I actually meant anything. And after…" she gulped.

What she wanted to say was,_ And after recent events, that was just an extra blow to what I've been feeling,_ but she didn't want to give any hints of her true feelings.

Her feelings for Gray.

So instead she turned to him, forced herself to smile, and said, "You know us girls, sensitive when it comes to that kind of thing."

He was staring up at the stars, and just nodded absently. Anger flickered over his face so fast that Lucy thought she might have been imagining it.

She turned back to stare up at the night sky as well, and they sat there for awhile in silence.

Lucy didn't know how long it had been when Gray finally spoke, catching her completely off guard with his question.

"That man…the boy's father, he bothered you, didn't he?" he wasn't looking at her when he asked it, but she could tell he already knew the answer.

She turned to him, surprised, and answered reluctantly.

"…Yes."

"Did he remind you of your father?" this time he did look at her when he spoke, and there was an emotion in his eyes that she couldn't quite identify.

Worry?

Reluctance?

Sympathy?

She looked down again and nodded slowly, not quite meeting his eyes.

Thinking of her father made her feel…ashamed. She nearly cringed when she thought of all the damage he had done to Fairy Tail.

He'd destroyed the guild.

He'd hurt her friends.

And it was all to get to her.

None of them had ever once blamed her, and she'd been assured on more than one occasion that it wasn't her fault. She had slowly stopped blaming herself, but sometimes Lucy couldn't help but feel a little bit guilty.

There was a pressure on her chin, and she found her head being gently raised. Her eyes flickered up to Gray in surprise. She was stunned, and a blush immediately rose to her cheeks.

He was holding her chin so gently, and his skin felt so nice.

Cool.

Smooth.

Soft.

She had to stop herself from leaning into his touch.

"Tch, Lucy, how many times do you have to be told? It wasn't your fault." he said, annoyed, as if reading her mind.

She frowned at him, "Sometimes, Gray, I think you know me too well."

_And sometimes, I'm glad you can be just as oblivious as Natsu,_ she added to herself.

It was about then that he noticed his hand was still on her chin, and he pulled it away hastily.

Was it just her imagination, or did his cheeks have a small tinge of pink to them? She laughed at the thought of Gray blushing, thinking herself silly for even considering it. He gave her a slightly reproachful look, but the tip of his lips tilted up faintly in a smile too.

With a small, sad, but contented sigh, Lucy put her arms behind her, hands on the grass, and stretched out, propping herself up that way instead.

This was nice. She liked sitting here, just talking with Gray.

No loud, rowdy Natsu to interrupt them.

No annoying, clingy Juvia to bother them.

No distractions, just them.

If it hadn't been for the nagging ache in her chest that continuously reminded her that he wasn't hers, Lucy would have wished it could last forever.

Gray was looking at her thoughtfully, his brow furrowed as if trying to figure something out. He almost looked like he was weighing a decision. He started to open his mouth once, then closed it for a moment and frowned a little more. She looked over at him and laughed softly, which is what seemed to decide his decision.

He turned so he was looking up at the sky again, and said,

"Lucy, if you need to talk about…what's been bothering you lately, well… Erza is better at this kind of thing," he faltered a little, but continued, "You can tell me too. That is, if you want to, of course, because, well, you know," he was beginning to babble, which he must have realized, because he promptly shut his mouth.

The way he said the words was very awkward, as if he wasn't used to this kind of conversation, but he sounded genuinely worried.

Lucy's eyes widened in alarm and she didn't realize that she was staring at him until he gave her a sideways glance, and asked, defensively,

"What?"

This time she was positive that his cheeks really were a light pink.

She'd have to learn to be better at hiding what was wrong. For now, she reached over with a grin and pinched his cheek playfully.

"Awww, how cute! I've never heard the big, bad ice mage talk like that."

He scowled at her, "Hey, I was being serious, and you ruined it!"

She just put her hand to her mouth and giggled while looking at him fondly. He stared at her for a moment with an unreadable expression, before sighing, standing up and offering her his hand.

"Come on, we'd better be getting back."

Lucy nodded and reached up, grabbing his hand and letting him pull her up, but she must have been lighter than he thought, because he pulled a little too hard.

She ended up tripping into his chest and grabbing onto his shoulders to steady her balance. He immediately grasped her arms to keep her from falling.

Her head tilted upwards slowly, her eyes lingering on his lips for a moment, before moving farther up to meet his own eyes.

Then they both sprung apart, avoiding looking at the other, both of their faces reddening.

Lucy's heart was beating so hard she could hear it.

A few minutes of awkward silence passed, and Lucy's pounding heart finally began to slow, her face retaining it's usual light pink color, rather than the dark shade that had recently been coloring them.

"I-it's getting r-really late," Gray stuttered, embarrassed.

She nodded, but neither of them moved.

"Gray, I…" Lucy began, but stopped. He had told her that she could talk to him, but what was she supposed to say?

_Oh, by the way Gray, I've had strong feelings for you for months, so when you got with Juvia it sort of broke my heart._

Somehow, Lucy doubted that would go over well.

Instead, she just turned to him and shook her head with a small smile.

"Thank you…" she said softly.

He nodded, a little stiffly, and looked awkward.

Neither of them said anything on the way back to the camp. Lucy wasn't afraid of any sounds she heard after that, she knew she didn't have her keys but Gray was there, and she felt safe with him. With a wry smile, she realized he was probably what she had heard before, meaning she had been afraid of him before, and now felt safe with him.

It dawned on her that, in a way, that applied to her feelings for him too. She had been so eager to avoid him, but she no longer felt the need. Even if she couldn't be with him how she wanted, and even if it hurt her to be near him, maybe it was worse when he wasn't around at all.

Now, Juvia was a different story, Lucy had no problem staying away from _her_.

But hadn't Gray said to fight it? Of course, he didn't know exactly _what_ he had told her to fight, but he had still told her.

Something had to be done, but whether it was accepting the situation or fighting it, Lucy decided, would be up to Juvia. If Juvia could prove herself worthy, in Lucy's eyes, and truly make Gray happy, Lucy would accept it.

And if she couldn't…

Well, Lucy would just have to figure that out later. Maybe she would talk to Gray, he had said she could go to him, and he was generally very reasonable. If she pointed out that Juvia wasn't making him happy, and everything else wrong with the relationship, Gray might see her point.

Lucy had no idea yet of the true lengths that she would go to when pushed far enough.

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**Personally, I thought this chapter may have been a little OOC because I got so caught up in it, but I really did my best to keep it IC. I also am debating on writing this one from Gray's POV, what do you guys think? Possibly putting it in a flashback. Please let me know. Either way, I hope you enjoyed it!**


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